In a couple of weeks, a decision may be
announced on the divorce suit filed by Rev.
Anita Oyakhilome against her husband Rev.
Chris Oyakhilome, the President of Christ
Embassy church.
The couple’s first daughter Sharon
Oyakhilome, took to Twitter a few hours ago
to post a cryptic message which seemingly
appears to support her mother’s divorce
decision. Her tweets appear to be similar to
the case Rev. Anita Oyakhilome cited in the
divorce papers where she stated that her
husband had been away for the most part of
their marriage.
Anita
According to the divorce documents:
“The wife(Anita) will say that they have lived
separately for 16 years and over this time
have drifted apart. The wife has come to
realise that the husband will only visit the UK
for annual church programmes that he holds
rather than to be with this wife.
“The wife feels that he has been unavailable
as a father to their children during their
developing years. The wife feels that their
marriage suffered under the pressure of
their work. They would rarely spend time
together due to the husband unavailability.
Special occasions such as Christmas,
Birthdays and family occasions and
anniversaries past them by and their rarely
spent any time together as a family as the
husband was more devoted to his work than
he was to them.”
Menwhile, another Christ Embassy church
member, has penned a thought-provoking
article in defence of Rev. Anita Oyakhilome.
Read:
In Defence of Anita Oyakhilome
“Anita Oyakhilome, the frustrated wife of
Nigeria’s most flamboyant preacher, Chris
Oyakhilome has obviously passed through 15
years of adulterous endurance and what she
needs is our prayers and protective respect
and defense of her choices to forget all the
anti-rhapsody of heartbreak she endured all
these years.
Fifteen(15) years of being abandoned by a
preacher husband is not an easy way of
lifefor a preacher’s wife. Fifteen (15) years of
hearing that some mini skirted daughters of
Jezebel have taken over your possession is
not a joke. Fifteen years of a husband not
staying with the wife for up to a week on a
stretch,while spending time with some
double breasted figure eight(ed) daughters of
eve is not an easy thing to swallow. 15 years
of being used as a showcase to make church
members believe in Rhapsodies of Blissful
Union, while dying in silence,is not a
palatable experience for any woman.
Fifteen years of being called Mama, Mummy,
and other glorified names of Senior
Pastor’swife while some domestic harems
sneer at the same Mummy behind is not a
sweet experience. For goodness sake, this
woman never probably had a good kiss in
fifteen years and yet she is being accused of
carnality for crying out loud.She was
continually being led into temptation of
seeking for sexual satisfaction from outside
for fifteen years and she managed to escape
the traps of sin.
Fifteen years when their two lovely
daughters would wake up and ask their
mother why Dad had not cared to visit, and
she would have to release a lie to stave off the
frequent probing questions. Above all,
fifteen years when Anita had to fake that all
is well with their marriage, while she is
actually dying emotionally. Every person she
complained to among the pastoral cadre
sided with the man, and she was left alone to
bear her cross.
I warned some pastor friends with Christ
Embassy early 2013 that they had better
settle this marriage rift between Oga and his
wife before it destroys the church. The same
pastors have called me to express regret that
a national embarrassment has ensued.
This woman has been called Jezebel by some
pastors and members of the church. Some
claimed she was disrespectful while others
claimed she was always bitter of recent.They
have tried to castigate her before members of
the church who came in private to ask for the
way out. She was described as unreasonable
and insubordinate.
Her husband, according to news reports has
even followed to cast her in bad
light.According to Pastor Chris Oyakhilome,
“Bitterness is prolonged and accumulate
danger. My wife is always angry and bitter,”
Going further he told his members to “Be
careful of the friends you keep. My wife
keeps friends who bring out the worst in her
and help her see the worst in people, instead
of keeping friends that will help her vision,
especially as the wife of a global pastor like
me.”
Please,which preacher woman who has been
abandoned for fifteen years will not be bitter
and angry? Was Anita expected to clap and
dance while some hot legs are parading
around the White House?
This pastor’s wife was also disclaimed by her
husband who told his congregants in reaction
to the divorce saga that Anita is not
necessarily a Woman of God.According to
Pastor Oyakhilome “Don’t act like those
people. If you are married to a man of God, it
doesn’t make you automatically mature. You
can make mistakes; you can do something
that is wrong. But some people expect the
wife of a minister to definitely be at the level
of that minister and so they may be looked
upon and the expectation may be like that,
but it’s a positional thing”.He clarified his
theory by saying that “If a man of God is
married, it doesn’t automatically mean that
the wife of a man of God is therefore a
woman of God.
That’s not the way it is in the Bible.” Pastor
Chris also added that “That’s why you don’t
really find the wives of men of God
mentioned in the Bible. How many of them?
Who was Peter’s wife, did you ever know her
name? You never find that out. Who was
John’s wife? Did you ever read the name?
What about all theother Apostles? How many
of their names are written in the Bible. You
never find their names.”
Anita Oyakhilome actually proved that she
has fear of God in the manner she worded her
divorce plea. She opted to use the word
“inappropriate relationship with female staff
members” instead of out rightly accusing her
husband of adultery.According to the
statement, “the wife has discussed with the
husband his appropriate relationship with
some of his female staff members. She has
explained that this has given her cause for
concern. The husband has minimised her
worries and taken no step to alleviate her
grievances.”
Anita Oyakhilome could have said that her
husband abandoned her and ran into the
arms of sister A or B, or gospel singer C or D
and left her roasting and murmuring in the
house. Anita could have said that her
husband is a hypocrite who says a thing and
means another, but she veiled her grievances
of years of abandonment by saying in the
divorce file that “The wife feels that she has
been used to portray and enhance the
husband’s image as a family man when the
reality is that there is no existing
relationship between them. She feels that she
has been present for official functions simply
for his convenience.
On occasions she has been copied into his
travel itinerary which has been given to him
by his staff on a need to know basis”. “The
wife has tried to discuss her concernswith
the husband. He claims that she is carnal and
he is insensitive to her feelings and her
needs.”
Thus Anita had acted with much restraint in
order to preserve the integrity of Christ
Embassy and the work of evangelism, and all
she got for her discretion was hate messages
all many sections of church members who
wanted her to sacrifice her marriage to keep
them in a rhapsody of deceit.
This woman, according to the testimony of
many British residents who attend their
church, is one person who is always willing to
give gifts to the needy. She is ever ready to
counsel people and does not breed class. She
is a patient listener who laboriously
introduced many things in the church for
which the glory goes to her husband.
Londoners believe that she is not that demon
theywant to portray her as. Those who know
her closely have attested to an affectionate
good naturedness and stickler for details.
Whatsoeverthing some misguided church
members want to think, Anita had lived a lie
formany years. Anita was said to have
became born again at believers
Loveworldcampus fellowship at Ambrose Alli
University Ekpoma, while Chris was
thepastor. She had probably paid her dues as
a Christian and knows what it is todeceive
the congregation. She cannot deceive herself
and the church anymorethus she opted for
divorce. Divorce, according to scripture is
unbiblical, but between deceiving a
congregation that already knows the truth
but pretends otherwise and staying in
unfulfilled marriage, which is better. It is a
matter between her and her conscience.
Last year, a Nigerian personality blogger by
name Ese Walter was lured by her Senior
Pastor in Abuja into a cozy hotel bed space in
London and after two weeks of adultery, the
man cleaned up, returned to Nigeria and told
his congregation to shout some Hallelujah.
The sin partner was arrested by the Holy
Spirit and she sought a meeting with the
COZA Chief to resolve the burden of guilt.
She was continually shunned and described
as agent of satan even by other senior pastors
in the church until she turned the internet
into the confessional. Ese Walter freed her
conscience and probably escaped eternal
damnation but the entire Christendom took
the brunt of the exposure.
Pope Benedict made several attempts to stop
the incidences of homosexual pedophiles
among priest and leaders in the Vatican. His
attempts were rebuffed by a cabal of officials
who resisted probe and pious change. In
exasperation, the Pontiff abandoned the
Papacy and triggered the change that is being
forced down on the resisting cabal. Pope
Benedict freed his conscience and left with
clean records before his God.
Anita has chosen to free herself from a life of
deceit and lies. The truth had set her free.
However, I still counsel her that if the
misbehaving preacher husband demonstrates
a verifiable change of heart, she should
consider him back and so that somebody can
shout some more Hallelujah. Fifteen years of
adulterous endurance in the midst of
charismatic rhapsody is not easy and Anita
Oyakhilome sure needs all the defense and
understanding she can get- Let somebody
shout a better Hallelujah!”
Writer: Obinna Akukwe
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